Rejecting invitations be it dinner-ing, clubbing, travelling, movie-ing, whatever-ing. Something I rarely do, and to be honest, I don't really know how to handle it well either.
It's always good to hangout with friends, talk gibberish and more gibberish. Who doesn't enjoy it? Somehow something always tell me that I shouldn't miss out on anything and so I always try my best to attend them meetings/gatherings.
She just invited me over to her place for dinner today. But I declined saying I had eaten and I had to study. HAH!!! What good excuse, ain't it?
Anyway, I kinda feel guilty now. Somebody comfort me please...
There are 3 main situations that lead men to be pathetic for women. That is when a man wants something that he can't get (like sex or love), when a man looses something that he wants back (like a girlfriend) and when a man is in the process of loosing something he doesn't want to loose (like an imminent break up).
A man that says or does pathetic things to fix any of these situations becomes as unattractive as he can possibly became. Nothing is more of a turn off for a woman that a man that begs for pity or for some concession.
Let me give you some examples. A classic one is a man that lusts after a woman, or women, and he is not getting anything in return to his attentions or his attempts; or perhaps he is getting only a small amount of teasing that keeps him trying without real success. This situation is so common that any man on the planet at least once faced it at some point in life. I did too, a few times. The worse possible thing a man can do in this cases is to became pathetic and beg or send cries for attention. This is often done by guys in the forms of complaints on their miserable existence or situation, cries of desperation, pathetic letters and messages, claims of infinite love or other overwhelming feelings, exaggerations going from talking about suicide to cries of pain toward God or nature or other universal and immense concepts. A man that acts this way will never ever get anything other than pity from the object of his desires. Even if a man gets something out of pity, like a forced date, it is going to be only as a way for a woman to stop the torture and to stop the pathetic cry in hope that it won't happen again.
If you can't get what you want, please do not be pathetic. You make people puke, you do not attract anything but pity. It is disgusting and miserable; an insult to humanity and a waste of your energies that you could use in better ways.
Another example is when a relationship is ending and a man doesn't want it to end. A man that wants to maintain a relationship going should never beg or became pathetic with sad love letters, cute and constant messages of eternal love, constantly calling and trying from every angle including harassing or using common friends or family. If he does he will loose all the respect of a woman and any real possibility of a long and happy relationship in the future.
There are some exceptions in which desperation is sincere and is briefly expressed immediately and on the spot of some painful event. This is sad but not necessarily pathetic, and sometimes it needs to happen spontaneously to express some overwhelming feelings.
As an example, if a woman leaves a man after a long relationship and a man cries spontaneously, that is sad but understandable. While I don't think it helps anything and I personally wouldn't do it, I also won't pass judgment on that. After this strong first reaction a man needs to find his calm and stance and face the situation. No whining, no self pity, no crawling on knees or beg for concessions. A man needs to face reality and either try to fix whatever went wrong, if there is a way to do so, or just accept it and move on. Life doesn't end and begging is not going to bring anything back. It just pushes a woman away further and further.
I am not saying that a man shouldn't suffer. Suffering because a woman is normal and it happens. I suffered many times. I am saying that a man shouldn't try to get back what he lost trying to inspire pity or other sad feelings.
You need to be what the woman you care about used to like, not a mess of tears and sad exaggerations. That is very unattractive.
If she leaves you for something you did, you should try to understand your fault talking to her. If you can't see it, do not admit a fault that you don't understand or even have. Accept the fact that she doesn't like you for what you are and move on, knowing that is better that way. You don't want to be with someone that doesn't appreciate your real self. On the oter hand, if you can see a fault in your actions, see if you can and want to fix it and if she is willing to give you a chance. If not, move on. Don't try to fix what can't be fixed or what doesn't exist. Don't change yourself to accommodate a woman. It may seem like a good thing to do on the moment of crisis (like claiming "I'll change..."), but it is not a good thing in the long term. People don't change unless they learn either falling hard or with time and experience. The "I'll change" promise is sincere when is made; as soon as the situation calms down, that promise is forgotten and things go back to be what they were. Men have a short memory.
The bottom line is: if you are a man, please never be pathetic to get a woman. It is not going to work. Period.
John of Darkskies just send me a contact form on one of his new ideas.
It's pretty cool and I can see he has had some thoughts put into it. It's a set of tags for different tagging services.
I'm not sure social networking is the right term to use here since it's basically just tagging. And tagging has got nothing to do with social, only helps with search engine rankings and search engine traffics.
Let me give you an example: Windows Live Mail beta. This entry, more than any entry in this blog received a huge boost due to those taggings.
Anyway, it's still a pretty good idea. Should your reader feel like they want to find out more about the related topic, they can just follow those links and see what other people are talking about.
We still lack enough reasons why people should start tagging. It's like, what's the point of using "Extended entry" or "keywords". What's the point of having them? What do they do? Until now, eventhough I'm using them, I'm still not exactly clear what they are for.
J f Z has some pretty nice logos to help promote this habit. Although unnecessary because you can do it without them, but it adds style and class to it.
I'm a very lucky guy I must admit. Everytime I go out, either clubbing (everyday for the last eight days), drinking, site seeing, I'm always surrounded by gorgeous girls friends and every dude around would just be watching me with admiring eyes.
They'll ask, "What's this guy have that I don't have? He is just so regular. Short. Skinny. No money. Dance like a stripper. He must be gay. Girls love gays."
Yeah, I'm just a regular guy. Wrong. HAHA (But I'm not gay)
You see, these are my friends. Although they are girls. Gorgeous. Eye catching. Sexy. Smart. Intelligent. They are nonetheless, my friends. Some of them are even my closest friends.
There was AG, FG, TG that I mentioned before, then there's AG2, GG (german), GG2, GG3, GG4, GG5... (wait, was there really so many German girls?), MG (mexican), MG2, FG2, FG3... (ooo...) I feel sorry for the Mancunian Slappers.
Anyway, it doesn't matter how many girlfriends I have. I'm not happy at all. None of them are my partner. None of them like a romantic relationship with me. None of them feel sexually attracted to me.
We do flirt but flirting is just a game. It's just for fun and there's really no lead into where it is going. Sigh...
It's not that I want more. It's just that I started to feeling lonely.
Then again, it's better to stay friends than being in a relationship. I get more (girls), for less (commitment). Besides, we care for each other like good friends do. Isn't that supposed to be good?
Many people come to this blog due to my previous entry wanting to find out how to cancel Windows Live Mail beta.
Why would anybody want to switch back, you ask? Well, I guess that very question speaks for itself. Livemail needs to put more work into making it more user-friendly.
Here's how to switch back to regular hotmail interface: 1) Log into your Hotmail account, 2) Go to Options. You can find it on the top right hand corner.
3) At the bottom you'll see "Beta opt-out", Click on it.
4) By opting out, you'll revert back to your original Hotmail account and basic features.
There might be something really major going on in the background of Blogdrive because several features aren't working at the moment. This includes the just recently discovered problem with the search feature.
There are two types of search feature within Blogdrive: 1) Search Entries - which is available to all Blogdrive users including free accounts. It can be accessed from within the blog admin area. 2) Visitor Site Search - which is only available to Blue Steel (plan 3) subscriber and it can be accessed from the main page of your blog.
Just very recently, some interesting changes have been observed by Gloria and myself. We both uses free blogdrive accounts (this blog is on a free account)
1) Both of the search feature no longer search for keywords within entry bodies. 2) Both of the search feature only search for keywords within entry titles. 3) Visitor Site Search works on Free accounts too. Try this: Blogdrive.
Weird? Weird indeed.
Well, I hope something nice is coming up soon. And I suspect we'll be suffering one more "Upgrading Server" situation to implement these new upgrades.
It is really addictive for those of you who still don't know what is it. The Gmail webclip have been around for a while now but just recently, they made text advertising appear more frequently than actuall RSS feed.
Ever since I started using Gmail I have "subconciously" made a decision not to click on any Advertising on the right hand side bar. The text links on the side bar are nearly invisible it didn't matter much.
Then came webclips, it started out as a pretty cool feature to have. I can randomly (while working) see if my favourite blog/news site have an interesting new article. It was fun and desirable until they added those links.
The thing is, since these text links are 100% optimized to me (i.e my email habit, work at the moment), it is VERY relevant to what I'm interested in. So relevant, I can't not click on them. And the position of the webclips also gives it a big plus points as it catches my eyes.
It was fun always catching headlines of several blogs I subscribed to when they have a new article. I've almost always click on them when I find something interesting to read. But since adverts were introduced, ... oh ouh...
Sadly, being stupid as I am, I'm not turning it off despite all those adverts. They are, afterall very relevant to what I do. Giving Google a few cents for it shouldn't be too bad eh? haha
It is really addictive for those of you who still don't know what is it. The Gmail webclip have been around for a while now but just recently, they made text advertising appear more frequently than actuall RSS feed.
Ever since I started using Gmail I have "subconciously" made a decision not to click on any Advertising on the right hand side bar. The text links on the side bar are nearly invisible it didn't matter much.
Then came webclips, it started out as a pretty cool feature to have. I can randomly (while working) see if my favourite blog/news site have an interesting new article. It was fun and desirable until they added those links.
The thing is, since these text links are 100% optimized to me (i.e my email habit, work at the moment), it is VERY relevant to what I'm interested in. So relevant, I can't not click on them. And the position of the webclips also gives it a big plus points as it catches my eyes.
It was fun always catching headlines of several blogs I subscribed to when they have a new article. I've almost always click on them when I find something interesting to read. But since adverts were introduced, ... oh ouh...
Sadly, being stupid as I am, I'm not turning it off despite all those adverts. They are, afterall very relevant to what I do. Giving Google a few cents for it shouldn't be too bad eh? haha
This is my new blogger blog. My real blog is in http://seigey.blogdrive.com/ where I blog. The reason I created a blog here is so that I can comment on Blogger blogs. Happy?
This isn't exactly what I used to talk about but I feel that this series of weird events and coincidental is just too bizarre not to blog about. I hope everyone is reading and will be very kind in give me some advices and comments.
These series of bizarrely weird and freak coincidence is so special that I've never came across in a romance book, novel or movies. As far as the topic of dating goes, I can almost always learn something from other people as each occurance tend to repeate it self in the same pattern yet different combinations.
And as the title suggest, it all revolves around this mysterious Italian guy named Ricardo. I, from now on will start using the terminology "Dating Ricardo" as to describe a series of bizarrely weird coincidence in the most unusual way.
When I say the MOST unusual way, I mean it.
Let's start with a little background on my "dating" history, dated back to ... October 2005.
Semester just started and I met this pretty Taiwanese Girl (TG). Started seeing her for a bit for minor events such as late night supper and eventually we went out clubbing together. She's a lovely girl, very smart and she's currently doing her PhD. (Note: boobs and brains) Many times, part of our conversation she mentioned this italian guy (Ricardo) she was seeing a while back. Apparently things didn't work out between them so end of story. For me, of course it bites (whether or not it's jealousy) although I wasn't very interested in their story. Things didn't work out between us and we never met again.
That's girl number one, TG.
In between the second and third girl (story coming up), I've met up with several other girls, mostly Europeans. And through these friends I met second girl (Austrian Girl AG) and (French Girl FG).
Second girl AG is from Vienna doing her final year in Business management. She's hot and attractive, wonderful personality, love dancing. I meet her a lot, for dinner/clubbing/movies/travelling anything you name it. She's very ambitious, intelligent and full of self confidence. I met her around December from a good friend of mine. We didn't start going out until early February. As you have already known, just before we started to meet often she was going out with (you guessed) Ricardo. She didn't want to talk about it but it was a revealed by one of her flatmates by accident. From what I can guess, it didn't work out and so...
I've not met this mysteriously amazingly attractive guy. Until AG introduced him to me, we had a very short and brief conversation and never met again. However, stories about him never ceased to stop coming.
The story about the French girl (FG) is a bit different, instead of having met Ricardo first, she met me first unlike the others. Let me tell you this, there's no other girls I've met who can compete against her hotness. She is very attractive yet very good at hiding it. We share many common interest and I literally "fell-in-love" with her the first time I met her. Maybe it's a french thing. We got along well and she even invited me to several outings including the Bridge Water Hall concert just us. I've never actually dated FG but I would consider that I'm in a pretty good position should there be an oppurtunity. She's literally perfect, she's a flutist plays in the orchestra, sings in the choir, enjoys theatre and plays. (but she has a boyfriend in France)
Just yesterday, after not meeting with her for nearly a month. I called her asking how is she? How's stuff and the usual simple things. She said she was happily with her boyfriend. not the one from France but from Italy. Right, you guessed it, he is called Ricardo.
All these girls, TG, AG, and FG are intelligently beautiful international girls. They are not sluts who flirts around or sleep around. The kind who know what they want in life. What's more, they never met each other.
Back to the story, my house currently have one empty room and I've been spreading words around to friends asking if anybody is interested in living in a house. One of the guys that came to see the house, is currently staying with Ricardo.
Right, how many more coincidence can I come up with? I've never met this italian guy (okay, only once). He's dated all these girls.
In summary, three girls that I've dated to a certain extent has had a history with him. And one is currently with him.
In case you are asking some question, here's the quick answer: - There's only one Ricardo studying PhD in NeuroScience in the whole of Manchester, I've checked. - All of these girls I meet, never met each other. - Our circle of friends aren't the same and not very big either.
This has been bothering me, as some of you might have already known. I felt a bit betrayed or maybe jealous. And I can't see why is it that I've never met him yet he knows who I know.
Could it be, that he is similar to me? Could it be, that he is really just a nice guy? Someone said I should meet Ricardo.
Like I said, I've never came across such a coincidence. Words of comfort are very welcomed. I just can't understand how things turn out like this.
Please help me here people. I know this is such a rare type of event.
